do not read
happy new year's everyone!
From the NME: Singles of the year:
01: APHEX TWIN Windowlicker (Warp) Richard James, aka Aphex Twin, accepting
the award: "Smart! Thank you very much for voting for my track/s. I've
had a very good year as usual, although it was very intense, getting on
a really big
roll, writing new stuff constantly,
really looking forward to isolating myself next year even more! Hope everyone
has a totally boring New Year's party, overdoses on everything and chokes
on their own vomit on the bathroom floor, make sure you lie face down just
before you pass out!"
frankly i'm sick of
writing about music, but oh well, not much else to say.
nothing compares 2 u
did you know that sinead o'connor,
besides being a very good singer in my opinion, also produces her own asongs
and plays the following:
acoustic & electric guitars,
percussion, keyboards, and drum machine?
i love giving musicians who just
sing a hard time, but just jokingly. but usually i am more interested in
multi-instrumentalists; trent reznor, moby, thom yorke, (e) and the group
air for instance. new music i've listened to lately that i like are also
often multi-instrumentalists: andrea parker, faultline, etc. i haven't
heard much fugazi, but on someone's album (now i forget whose it is, ergh),
frontman ian mackaye plays guest drums and cello. interesting.
talk about conceptual art meets
reality. you know how people put blocks of frozen water in their coke?
i froze coke and put coke cubes in my water. it wasn't as tasty, but the
cubes solo were good.
Former Sex Pistols Manager To
Run For Mayor Of London
the "The Great [Political] Rock & Roll Swindle."
the man who helped mastermind the
rock group Sex Pistols, has thrown his hat
into the race
to be the first elected Mayor of London,
As part of his
platform, McLaren wants to legalize both
marijuana, allow libraries to sell alcohol, and
and pubs to remain open 24 hours a day.
also proposed replacing buses with an
system and starting a new lottery to help
house the homeless.
national public radio has given
the results of the 100 most important american musical works of the 20th
century. in this list you'll find artists like john cage, miles davis,
bob dylan, the ramones, patsy cline, james taylor, jimi hendrix, dizzy
gillespie, thelonious monk, john coltrane, nirvana, the beach boys, louis
prima, and many more. i highly recommend you check out the list. click:
man i love seeing the Digidaughter.
so good yet so familiar in a bizarre way. just like the parent, which 'n
itself is scary.
is it even worth mentioning that
voted garbage as being a more important band than r.e.m. in the '90s? and
this was in the upper 20s, i don't even want to know where limp bizkit
posted by: howisya ||
Sun Dec-12-99 6:47 PM EST || see profile || send
a private message
subject: "'the fragile' tanked."
-mtv year in rock '99
man i love mtv.... they're geniuses.
that is a brilliant remark to make...
seriously, it sums up the current
state of music really well. mtv is inadvertently saying that
quality no longer matters, it's catchy singles.
success is measured in commercial
appeal to an audience who has forgotten quality music in favor of
meaningless garbage that they can listen to without having
to think. thanks mtv! you took the words right out of my mouth. say
it with me everybody, THE FRAGILE TANKED!
"I have become death, the destroyer
of worlds." J. Robert Oppenheimer
????? is the most sincere form
finally got my learner's today.
i was extremely determined to get my permit before i turned 17. i made
it by just 5 days. i dunno if i got any questions wrong and if so how many
because i took the (easy) written test. i had to put up with computer failure
and an exaggerated perspective of how my nose looks from the side, but
at least i have a shiny new id. not that i care about driving at all, i
just didn't have an id.
i can't believe i haven't updated
in so long. that's kinda cool. i wrote an update yesterday but netscape
crashed before i could save it. memory problems. maybe i'll be getting
more ram for my birthday or christmas. but honestly the real problem is
the "swipe file". it tries to get the 10, 32, 64 megs of hard drive space
for memory use but comes up with nothing. i have a serious hard drive space
problem. too many dang mp3's. so my #1 computer gadget to get is a 20.4
gig Western Digital (digi digi) Hard Drive. i have no idea if it has to
be internal or external. if it's external it will look ugly as hell and
probably be slow-ish. if it is internal then cool, but the problem may
be that there is no room for a 2nd internal hard drive. anyone know if
i can do that? i don't want to delete my current one because i have no
disks to back my computer up on. i'd also like a cd-r burner, that way
i can move some mp3's onto audio cd's. it's all very confusing and expensive
and actually i think a new computer with these features would be cheaper.
but i can't afford a new one and my mom refuses to buy one (since she bought
this piece of crap literally only 2 years ago - christmas).
i feel sorry for my mom. she's so
aloof (eye problem and i guess old age). it sucks that i have to find out
my own presents unintentionally. 2 years ago i had to carry my own computer
into the house like a day or two before the holiday. also today she bought
a couple movies for me while i was with her in the store. and i gave her
an order form for 2 t-shirts i want (out of print nin - closer to god &
orbital - blue swiggly) and instead of having them mailed to her work (which
i would have done) or a friend/neighbor she just mailed it to the house,
and she knows i always take in the mail. how unfortunate. silly? i dunno.
how scandinavian of me.
yamaha ps-240 i think was what i
played with at the store. pretty cool, but i'd like something more techno-y
and less gimicky. but you know, $150 is a good price. something to think
about for the upcoming months.
January 1, 2000
January 1, 2001
last few movies i saw, most recent
Being John Malkovich
movies i want to see, from most
to least interested:
End Of Days
some new Jane
who dropped the bomb
on hip-hop? who got biggie and who shot tupac?
a couple of good '80s bands i somehow left out yesterday
are sonic youth and the police. i guess i do need all my fingers
to count the number of decent '80s bands.
princess mononoke is a good movie which you should all
you know how everyone always talks
about how music in the '80s sucked? i pretty much agree. i think i can
literally count on my fingers the number of GOOD bands who were popular
in the '80s. here we go...
u2, rem, depeche mode, metallica,
skinny puppy, jane's addiction, queen, nine inch nails.
yup, didn't even need 10 fingers.
hey here's the new smashing pumpkins tracklisting, not that you care:
8. this time
3, 10 (a + b), 11, 13-14 i've heard
and actually, heh, have on a double-cd. 13 is really good. they cut some
of their best songs tho, like "dross" and "speed kills". oh well. i got
9. the imploding voice
inside your love*
10. glass + the ghost children
of the mourning
sacred + profane
12. crying tree
13. blue skies bring tears
14. with every light
* first single
i'm really getting sick of the
"i'm not feeling all right today."
actually i'm feeling all wrong.
i'm so sick. the last 2 days i've
had a cold due to the 2 year olds i "work with" every tuesday. they don't
cover their mouths. so i caught a cold from them. (2 year olds are sick
often - at least 2 (number of the day i guess) or 3 were sick). so that
sucks. tuesday night through wednesday the sickness was confined to my
sinus area. my left nostril was crying for hours yesterday. and i could
only breathe through my right nostril.
today was the same, only it became
much worse. as of now, i have those same premiere symptomes + 1) very hot
forehead [temperature], 2) blistering headache 3) sore and thoroughly infected
throat. my mouth feels like i just frenched a hot tamale. seriously, the
roof of my mouth, tonsils and throat all feel absolutely horrible, like
they're being stuck with pins from the inside. i'm sick, yet not sick enough
to stay home from school. truly an unfortunate predicament.
i've looked and felt truly post-apocalyptic
the last hour. i look really horrendous, truly messed up. this is satisfying
to me, although i could do without the cold. at least i got to surf a bus.
this is a lot safer than car surfing. i didn't have my fare out so i squatted
at the front of the bus to get it out of my backpack. then the bus moved.
i surfed the bus for like 2 minutes, hands not holding onto anything cos
one hand was full (cd player and headphones) and the other was looking
for money or putting money back in my bag. fortunately i couldn't felt
the weight of everyone's eyes on this white boy in a suit surfing a bus
because i was wearing my "ski hat" (according to the abbot). it's just
a big grey winter hat but i guess you could wear it skiing.
there really isn't much else to
say. i meant to write this yesterday: "no, we don't gnaw on our kitty."
and now some w33z3r: "the world has turned and left me here." o the humanity!
don't mean to emote but maybe i
most of what i was going to say
today i've either forgotten or decided not to write. in short, i've added
a couple more lines of lyrics to "x10d". song is beginning to form. new
lines could be a chorus. i may ditch it though as it does have an expletive.
who knows. i like where the lyrics are going though, they're what i had
in mind when i wrote the short 4-word "poem" (if it is one) 2 and a half
speaking of expletives, 2 of the
3 nin europe tour shirts have the "f" word in them. what the f? come on
guys, give me something i can wear proudly. hopefully their US shirts will
be different. this tour is called "fragility 1999" apparently. dumb.
now you're getting with it.
ok maybe i'm not. here's a wishwashy
analogy i came up with today. take it with a grain of salt, as it makes
little sense 5 hours later.
people live their lives blindly, i live my life strapped and bound to a
chair watching television with my eyes permanently taped open. so most
people can move and do things foolishly, i can see life for what it is
yet do nothing about it, if you understand what i am saying, makes for
a good soppy depressed misanthropic poem, doesn't it? but poetry sucks.
for me anyway. i don't do poems. just analogies.
here's a list
of names i'm considering for my one-person musical project '99/'00:
ideas range from "hymn" (or "bible"), which would be a project where i
take hymnal classics and make them electronica (but still honoring my christian
God as well as my roots in hymn singing), to "video game soundtrack" where
i do covers of video game scores i've always loved, including numerous
songs from: sega genesis "jurassic park", nes "kirby's adventure", super
nes/arcade "street fighter 2", gameboy "caesar's palace", etc. i love that
stuff. but i also want to another ep or a full album of mostly originals.
coming up with lyrics is hard though. i am going to start writing down
one-liners and then string them together. people will mistake it for genius.
||borrowed from an anime series i
|project blue book
||borrowed from a government conspiracy
||a play on my hometown, also a critical
comment on how i am not the normal hyattsville kid, i guess
|prince george's plasma
||a play on prince george's plaza
|poo poo clan
||some name i came up with in 6th
or 7th grade
|homeboy from the future
from a shareware game, barneystein. homeboy was one of the programmers.
|aborted fetus mission disk
||something i wrote on a computer
diskette, along with a sticker of a fetus
||name of a song i came up with
|hot teenage moms
||a lot of my lyrics will be about
teenage promiscuity, this would be an appropriate name. like young black
teenagers, but you don't remember them. do you?
|mutilation is silly
||well it is, isn't it?
||named after the bps (bauds per second) of my
first modem which i had for years
lalala. ok so
besides my musical project which i am starting to get really into (as you
see), i am also going to create a fake ezine on this very site, i think.
the idea came to me today when reading the school newspaper. i figured
i could write good articles too, i just don't want people to read them.
well, not people who wouldn't appreciate them, i mean. so as a joke i told
myself i'd spend time writing print-worthy articles and instead of submitting
them i'd just post them up here, for basically no one to ever read but
myself. those kinds of things fulfill me, oddly. then i had an improvement
on the idea. i would make it look like a real ezine with real writers.
but the kicker would be that all the names of the writers are really just
aliases for me. i would write all these articles from different points
of views, even making up facts, just to make it look authentic. sounds
like fun to me, but also more hard work. if you know me, you know i don't
like to do hard work. today was the first time i've done homework since
thursday night. w0wisya!
else for me to say. if you didn't like this, oh well. if you did enjoy
reading this, why? get out of my head man. well ok stay but be gentle!
"careful - it's fragile!" *chuckle*
white people are so aloof.
black people are aware, but not
nin's first concert in 3+ years
tonight in spain. w00. someone better bootleg it, that's all i have to
i've got the will to drive
i've got the will to drive myself
i've got the will to drive myself
5-5, 6-7. i've been awake for 22 hours
(excluding a 1 hour nap). it's weird. going to sleep soon, don't worry.
you know how you're always not
fully awake in the morning? it's the absolute opposite if you reverse your
sleeping pattern. i was alert this morning. instead of most people gradually
becoming alert, i just deteriorated from there. it was kinda cool actually.
a great experiment, but one i will not repeat. unfortunately i missed my
favorite minute of the year yesterday: 11/11 11:11AM. i look forward to
i got an email from trent. yea.
hehe. more details in the nin
great big white world. monday.
predictable. fun and excitement. twice. here:
| sweet meat.
got no idea
| the perfect
| my lemons
smell like feet.
a list of many of
my infamous online aliases over the years. chronological order (más
|Homeboy From The Future
|Ghost In The Shell
"Somebody Hates Me"
ok, so i made attempt #3 to get
my learner's permit today. (yes, i really AM almost 17.) and i've wasted
my third saturday at the DMV now. yes, once again i was denied application.
it's not that i keep failing the test - i haven't even seen the
test yet. in an effort to take more "responsibility", i am going to admit
that each of the 3 times is "fully my fault". i do like to blame my mom
for things. but for your enjoyment and my immaturity, here are some interesting
try #1: mom told me the DMV closes
at 1:00, so we get there at 12:30. it actually closes at 12:00 on saturdays.
try #2: very ready to take the
test, and i almost do. have all materials and a great application. after
waiting over an hour i am rejected in 20 seconds because i have a photocopy
of my birth certificate, not an actual birth certificate. my mom thought
a photocopy would be ok, but they wanted what they call a "real" one. so
we go home empty handed (i mean, with no permit) and look for a "real"
copy. we can't find one for weeks. i write to new jersey and ask for them
to send me one, a process that takes 6 weeks. this week my mom went to
the safety deposit box and withdrew a "real" copy of my certificate. go
try #3: with all materials including
a photo id and birth certificate in hand we drive to the DMV. this time
my mom doesn't want to come in with me cos she's "wasted [her] time enough".
so i get dropped off, which is fine with me since i don't really like being
talked to when trying to concentrate on something. anyway, another hour
is waited. then i go up and get similarly rejected, this time for not having
my application signed by my mom. am i angry? yes. frustrated and disappointed?
that too. but to be honest, i should have read the application over again.
well, hopefully i'll try again
next saturday. wish me luck. maybe i'll actually get to be tested too.
by the way,
i am a little tired of getting 3 new emails each time i check my inbox
- they're always spam mail and "tripod insiders". please send me email!
no matter how frivolous. i love real email. my email address is: email@example.com
"recognize i'm a fool and you looooove
"life is yours to piss on." september
"yo im slippin im fallin i cant
get up" yesterday
"u ken sink quietly or u ken go
down kickin and screamin. OR you can swim to the surface.
uv course i roat an ap ol o gee
letr and it wurkgrp'd.
tout dans son bon endroit... for
today's "do not read" topic is
unnecessary (but not unusual) punishment. i will try to relate all of my
comments to this.
i guess i've
had a weird last 3 hours. in one of my afternoon classes today i had a
paper returned. 97%, pretty good, huh? but it was actually an 80%. you
see, the original grade was a 59%. i know, that is pretty low. originally
i wrote the paper at 1 am, not understanding the topic at all. i was tired,
i didn't read the assignment fully and i was quite aware i was writing
the worst paper i've written all year, if not ever. i knew i was doing
something wrong cos it was all creative writing and that is not what the
class is. anyway i was given the chance to re-do the paper, which was really
nice. but the catch was that the new grade would be averaged with the 59%.
that angered me. all other teachers let the 2nd grade count instead. i
didn't say anything about it, at the risk that my chance to re-write it
would be denied completely. anyway, it still really sucks.
ok, next class.
the clueless teacher, who i am nice to and vice versa, informs me that
i have a detention. she couldn't tell me why because she didn't even know,
but a secretary told her that two other kids and myself were "talking disrespectfully"
about the teacher. I DID NO SUCH THING!! neither did the other kid who
was in class today - the third kid, who reads this page i think, was absent.
of the two kids present, neither of us did anything at all and we still
have detentions. i am one of the quietest and most polite people in the
class, i find the whole thing
just a little suspicious. and i
will not be serving this detention - my first of the year and 4th ever.
ok more school
stuff. "unnecessary punishment" is kind of an exaggeration, but it is still
disappointing. got my school photos back today. never seen funnier pictures
of me in in my entire life. they are HILARIOUS. picture acne, chin stubble,
chubby cheeks, yellow teeth and a messed up smile. it's great. i don't
even mind because it's just so comical. i'm not depressed. if i had one
or two of those things then i'd be kinda depressed about the photograph,
but having all five makes it a great photo. i know i'm not that ugly and
nor do i have any of those features on a regular basis - just that one
day. i am grateful it was set aside from the other pictures though, the
kids would have had a field day. another funny thing is that my mom paid
like $15 to get a photo package with these nice sets and blowups of the
photograph. it's absolutely wonderful.
it would have been nice to have
a normal pic that i could show people (without laughing), but unfortunately
that's not the case. i will work on getting that thing scanned!
onto bus. big scary guy runs out of the bus door. gets his hat caught up.
stands there outside the bus screaming at us, like some kind of angry animal,
which is just what he was. mostly aimed at one nice dad with his kid. he
looked at me a couple times since i was right in line with the door. it
scared me but it also made me laugh. guy was a total psychopath. i guess
some people really don't grow up...
in the post
office now. had to pay $3.15 for shipping on an item. the ebay bidder didn't
even give any extra money for shipping either. kind of irritating. got
the money order. a nice sum of money, but it means i have to go to the
bank and cash it - very annoying. also i wasn't as satisfied with the amount.
originally the bidder offered over $10 more (if that was "ok" with me)
and i told the bidder to deduct the price. now i wonder if i should have
done that. i know i did the right thing. the loving, christian thing. but
hey, i like money and i think the person actually had it too and was willing
to spend it. i guess i should have just accepted the original bid.
walk home and
get looked at funny by some grown man driving by in his car. i was wearing
a suit and tie (school dresscode) and a big puke green backpack. people
are such rude gawkers.
Live cd still
scratched up, i think. i'm not having a good week. tired. not doing great
in school. discontent and discombobulated. rambling. being introspective
which i promised i wouldn't be. this page needs to get more extrospective,
if that is even a word. going to shave off the
stubble and brush my teeth now.
"If I have seen
farther, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants." -Isaac Newton
i am SO sorry for ever dissing
live's new album. it is all that and more. ok so i still don't like it
more than the old albums, but hey it's still new, right? it has a bunch
of great songs, like the beautiful "face & ghost (the children's
song)", "the distance", and the badass hard rock anthem "where fishes
go". (i saw them do this song live long before the album was out and it
was just straight METAL, yo. the album version isn't quite as heavy but
it still rocks hard, and the singing is even more chilling. is it just
me or are there crying female backup vocals hidden in the song? creepy.)
i'll have to give this album even more listens. other stuff i am currently
enjoying include johann sebastian bach's greatest hits ($6, 68 minutes
- great album), nin "the fragile" (yea, still), and the beta band "the
three ep's" (won it).
to weird schizophrenic homeless men ever freak you out? i've had some interesting
talks with the homeless but this guy was messed up. he starts talking to
me about how he had to beat up his 18 yr. old son - tough love. he expected
me to agree with him, like that's some great thing to do. according to
my aunt i look older than i am, and my mom figures the guy probably thought
i was in my 20's. anyway this guy guy, argh, he was talking about how his
son tried to stand up to him and how he punched him in the face to teach
him a lesson, "even though he's bigger than me." amnesty international,
i'll admit i
am not a big rage against the machine fan. but mad propz to them for their
new video, criticizing the commercial society we live in, and specifically
clothing stores like the gap. the video, for the "pretty good" song "guerilla
(gorilla) radio", presents all these contradictions and bad aspects of
the money driven society we unfortunately live in, delivered via gap commercial
parodies. highpoints include rows of immigrants slaving over sewing machines
and the band clad in hip clothing playing on pedestals in a white background.
marvelous. probably the best video i've seen all year. on a side note,
even though the song is not their best, there is a great section where
all the music stops and zach de la rocha says "it has to start somewhere
/ it has to start sometime / what better place than right here? / what
better time than right now?" and then the music starts up again.
"getting to know you, getting to
know all about you."
the face of perversity."
"the day you realize that all of
the odds are against you is the day you truly have become a man."
"so i figured
out songwriting. it's quite simple really. you look at or think of something
you like and just write about it. ok, so the songs aren't that deep, but
they're interesting, right? you can fool the listener into thinking they're
listening to these great lyrics and in fact they're really
about aunt jemimah."
"but you KNOW dat."
a taste sensation.
i found a very interesting short
article on internet addiction, specifically IRC
addiction. the site can be viewed here:
so i was hit #5000 on the 'official'
kinky worms page.
weird website with lots of nice
coding. artistic way to present views on freedom of speech, homophobia,
and other societal issues.
and i visited this great guy. trust
me, go to this website. you'll laugh and then you'll cry.
anyway, today was a good day. was on tv for a very
small bit playing trumpet w/ the jazz band. we were really good and our
team (scholastic team of 3 kids) won the competition on tv. the program
is called It's Academic. the episode airs November 20. we are going to
the semi-finals. saw a bunch of girls. didn't really like them. but a couple
were a-ok with me.
wow, i'm proud of myself for not
having updated in a while. even prouder that i won't be ranting here! this
isn't even a rant page. this is i dunno. i mean, it has comments, it has
links, it has just general weirdness.
so anyway instead of writing up
my opinions on teenage pregnancies, let me just link you up with another
site whose author says basically all my points. the link is here: teen
mothers/underage vixens. the rest of this author's page is pretty cool
just noticed i was writing with
correct capitalization, so i had to fix a few words.
one other link before i go:
completed CD-R auction - take this ebay!!
p.s. if you want a copy of that
CD-R that i sold, there is literally one copy left. i'll be selling it
on ebay sometime next week i guess. to view the tracklisting go to my council
of trent subpage "hunt
for the fragile".
well paint me in conformist colors.
is making a comeback. after a disappointing showing by korn's last album,
the coming of limp bizkit, and kid rock i have found some metal/rap that
has impressed me.
incubus is their name. i had heard
one of their songs, "new skin", a year or more before and was impressed
because the guy could actually sing. it wasn't a popular song but i suppose
the "in" people knew who they were. ok so they have a new album. their
new single, i think it's called "pardon me" (dumb title), is really
good. it seems to be a combination of cool jazz, hip-hop, alternative and
metal. it's really good. some of the best singing i've heard all year,
and coming from a group lumped in with the limp bizkit crowd, that's a
compliment. the dj is really good. he is much better than the dj's in limp
bizkit and kid rock's live band. i am not listening to the song at the
moment so it's kind of hard to describe. but do yourself a favor and try
to hear that song.
you're going to hate me for this
but i'm back to liking korn, kind of. i was never a big fan but i've always
admitted they have a few good songs. their last album was pretty much crap
though. well their new cd, with the lame title "issues", has been released
to the internet via mp3 a month early (illegally of course). i downloaded
one of the two new songs that they played at woodstock this year, "falling
away from me", which also happens to be their latest single (i liked the
song months before i knew it would be a single). what drew me to this song
originally was a simple quiet 7 note guitar riff. it was quite possible
the creepiest, most horrowing chord i had heard, at least in a long time.
that's only in two sections of the song but it made the song really incredible.
the rest of the song was korn's typical but catchy heavy droning guitars.
anyway i downloaded the album version and it's cool too. but they changed
the spooky 7 note riff to sound like some synth/midi nonsense, which is
a shame because it could have been one of their best achievements. i think
i'll burn both of these songs onto a cd because it will be a while before
this genre of music impresses me again.
on the front page i have linked
2 important sites.
hunger site - please go to this site and click on one little button.
by clicking you will feed starving people. no, seriously. sponsors pay
for food by the number of clicks on the "donate food" button. so just log
on and click if you care about humanity. thanks a lot...
a) am quite agile
b) like to play with candle wax
c) have the social life of a 12
d) all of the above
a) don't get it
b) are very nice
c) are cooler than i thought
d) none of the above
e) probably won't read: (?)
a) is really stupid
b) is really stupid
c) is really stupid
d) is the first day of my last
e) sucks, ebay shut me down! for
fight club : good movie : great
score : dust brothers
VAST : used in preview for new
leonardo dicaprio movie: excuse me : am i missing something here? : i guess
i've seen the world you live in
: and honestly : it scares me
i still remember : kinda : i don't
i coulda said so so so so : much
more : but i chose not to
and soon : what you own : owns
af : x
no easy answers this time. no personal
input. just a couple links.
- grow your own garden online!
- no, richard d. james did not quit making music. warp records would have
made an official announcement. "richard lies in interviews. period." (from
that link.) From NME:
"Insisting that the interview would
be his last, he said: 'It (the new album) will be out in about five years'
time, if at all. What about my fans? They'll have to wait 'til I'm dead
- if I haven't taken all my tapes to the grave with me! It's too distracting
when you release your music - you can't be honest. Sometimes you've got
to duck out completely.' He continued that the only possible forthcoming
release from him was an old-skool selection that he might be releasing
through his own label, Rephlex, on DAT."
Yea right! On DAT! aaaahahaha.
"this will be the last daily submission.
"i can't believe that today was
a good day." -ice cube
"10 hours of sleep. 7pm to 2am,
4am to 7am." -me
"thought he had it all before they
called his bluff / found out that his skin just wasn't thick enough / wanted
to go back to how it was before / thought he lost everything / then he
lost a whole lot more." -trent reznor
"told her off in my own unique
way today." -me
"blame canada." -south park movie
"mess with texas." -me
"yea, you can hand it in tomorrow....
"so you can make me what,
that doesn't make you jesus?" -me
"the goat says 'baaaa!!!'" -byron
"he sits with his feet in the toilet!"
"some things are everything to
me." -4am poet society
"destroy 2000 years of culture."
"travis christensen: chock full
of ideas, 24/7." the humorous part about that line is that i nearly missed
my bus stop just thinking of it. i "rang in" for the stop in time but the
guy didn't stop anyway, so i walked home from the next stop.
ok so here are the ideas i am "chock
full of". by the way, what the hell is a "chock" anyway? what a weird phrase.
according to dictionary.com:
chock \Chock\, adv. (Naut.)
Entirely; quite; as, chock home; chock aft.
so there you go. another funny
thing. i am so "chock full" of these ideas that i can't even function.
my creative brain is always working, and that totally throws off the part
of the brain that deals with facts and stuff. it's harder for me to learn
and study cos of that darn creative brain. anyway - the ideas.
invades dc. once the site is up and running and looking very nice i'm gonna
pollute dc and maybe hyattsville with small black and white flyers advertising
the site. it's going to be grande. i'm gonna try to get christian to help
me do this. i have it all planned out. i'll take pictures and everything.
also, about phux: i want to have 2 color schemes - a pink "womb room" and
a light blue and white setup.
02. came up with a massive riff.
i had this whole awesome rock song made up entirely in my head. it was
glorious, one of the best one's i've ever made. it started out with a single
crazy guitar and then came the massive deep hard rock guitar followed quickly
by hardhitting drums. the riff kept going then some kind of punk-ish singing
came on, but not joke punk - good ole 80s political punk. it was great.
it had lyrics too but i couldn't quite make them out. even had a keyboard
section, but it wasn't techno at all. unfortunately it all droned out into
jennifer lopez's "waiting for tonight" (just my luck) and now it's goo
goo dolls' "name". i still remember mostly how my song went, but not fully.
it sounded a lot like black flag meets sonic youth.
03. ok... had to get my school
binder out to remember this one. oh yea now i got it. i wrote down "talk
about the 2 stupidest fads". the 2 stupidest fads in the 90s among teenagers
are these: (a) females - skin carving; (b) males - car surfing. i'm sorry,
but if you do either, you are a total idiot. first. girls carving things
into their skin. it "relieves stress" or something. it's pretty damn sick,
that's what it is. how disgusting is that? getting a knife and cutting
up your own skin? i've talked to at least one person who does this and
she tried to defend it like it was just one of those things girls like
to do. gross man, gag me with a school. that is creepy. especially when
words or letters are carved in - like "TMC" for example. i won't say anymore
except that carving is for idiots. ok and about guys getting on the hoods
of cars and "surfing them": i hope you fall. idiot. have you no brain?
what possesses you to surf a car going 25 miles per hour? that's a total
nobrainer. yea i'm sure there is a thrill to it, but that is just totally
dangerous and mindless.
04. this isn't really an idea but
it's something i wanted to share. i borrowed a cd called "art of life"
by x-japan from nick. it's 1 track, exactly 29 minutes long. it is by far
one of the coolest songs i have ever heard in my life, and it has some
of the best lyrics ever. really great stuff. to read the lyrics click here
(please read them). i haven't found any other x-japan songs i like quite
as much as "art of life", but to hear lots of these great japanese rock
songs in mp3 format, head on over to this site: japanese
that's all i have to say for now.
but one thing i am telling myself is that these entries are becoming too
journal like. they're not journal entries cos it's not "today i did this
and it made me feel...". that's too lame for me to write. journals can
be fun to read but i don't want to write one. this page is supposed to
be a place where i can express ideas and stuff, not talk about my day.
i'm going to (a) try not to write daily (b) talk less about specific things
i did (stuff i want to do is fine tho). expect more of an anonymous viewpoint
in future updates. also expect less regularity in entries. peace out mah
brothers and sisters.
leo sucks. clint's here and no
one knows who he is. kind of funny but not.
i'll tell you what though. the
your feelings" section totally sucks. don't even go to it. or if you
go to it, view the pics separately, not through the indexes. the whole
thing about the page was that it was supposed to be like "ugly art". but
the transparencies didn't start out ugly, they just look ugly unless on
a white background. pretty messed up. it's supposed to be representational
or something but it just sucks. i said sucks a lot, i know. it's not too
bad, but i don't think it's a valuable addition to the site.
bisexuality: a fad
among teenage girls.
if you want to be cool yet not
seem too interested, greet people with a nice "what's up?". variations
on this include "wassup", "sup", and in a very sexy voice "...wuzup".
welcome to yet another exciting
entry to my "do not read" page. i actually have a lot of things to say
today, if i can remember. because people don't get that this is not
an online journal page, let me say a few words. this is merely a page of
incomplete mutterings. this is not some kind of twisted diary where i disclose
all my personal fears and hopes and dreams. forget that. not going to happen.
like every guy in the world, i will have you believe that i don't think
like that. and i certainly won't be sharing it with you, some stranger.
so today's thoughts will be listed off travis-style, cos when have you
ever known me to develop a full persuasive argument on one focused idea?
my mind is all over the place, all the time. i get a zillion ideas at once,
and usually forget most of them. creativity is a bitch. well, here we go.
01. i bet you didn't notice it,
but 2/3 of the previous entry was deleted. why? well i thought that what
i said was misleading. i don't want anyone to think that i genuinely feel
care, concern or intimacy with people as a whole. i do like people (and,
in a way, everyone), but i don't really care much about people i don't
know really well. if you catch my drift. the entry was mushy, which, in
retrospect, is quite laughable. also, i said a naughty word, which was
unnecessary. i don't want yet another creation i can't show people. i don't
feel ashamed of saying "bitch" in the introduction above because it's just
a phrase. if i said "so and so is a bitch" then i'd feel bad. note to self,
feel no remorse, that was just an example.
02. ASTONISHING PANORAMA OF END
TIMES. when i was walking home from school today i was a witness to human
behaviour (thanks bjork). i was entering my prestigious oglethorpe street
and right there at the turn into the highway was a minor accident. a fast
car zoomed through and hit a service van that was waiting to enter the
highway. the car kept driving, the van's driver leaped out of the van.
"COME HERE!" the brutish white man screamed, as he gestured with his finger
for the car's occupants to get out and come talk to him. slowly two african
american teenagers (one looking very respectable with nice clothing and
glasses). the man in his late twenties treated the two adolescents with
absolutely no respect. he screamed at them and pointed to the MINOR COSMETIC
BLEMISH on his van. it was a white knick. it's not like the car ran into
it or anything. so this guy is screaming at these two kids, and totally
treating them like they were four years old. i kept walking towards
my house but i listened in. at a safe distance i turned around and tried
to watch, but the "beefy" white guy looked back at me, as if saying "keep
walking, punk." so i kept walking, then stopped again to look. he went
back into his far to apparently get his insurance info. he wanted to make
these two kids really pay for this horrible thing they did to him. last
thing i saw was a car trying to enter the street followed by a big school
bus. i dunno what happened. but this guy was pissed, he looked like he
was gonna pound these kids' head in. i also suspect he said some racial
slurs, because he seemed like a racist to me.
03. there's a person i know. we'll
refer to him or her on this page as "High Fiving MF" because that fits
the personality perfectly (and the person might read this). total trendhopper,
and totally inconsiderate towards others. i was minding my own business
and then this person offered to do me a minor favor; it wasn't friendly,
it was more like "look how nice i can be, so take that". well i
accepted the favor tho i didn't need to at all. it was so minor that it
was aborted mid-way. very useless yet somehow i am supposed to be in debt
to this person. so as i retreated, i did a very major favor, quite effortlessly
and without even considering any kind of reward. shows who the kinder person
is, doesn't it?
04. gonna use this #4 to talk about
music (what else?). just got the tracklisting for the new celebrity deathmatch
album. looks nice! has the new marilyn manson song "astonishing panorama
of the endtimes". usually i could care less about manson, but this song
seems really interesting and i look forward to hearing it (and downloading
it). also features a remix of a cool eminem song, plus a teamup between
modern and classic masters of rap - canibus and rakim. also features the
ever funny kool keith (as himself, i think), a primus song to be the bonus
track on their new album (see my future
of music chart), . also features the song "let's go all the way" by
the wondergirls $. who are they? well it's mark mcgrath of sugar ray, jay
gordon from orgy, ian astbury of the cult, and production by scott weiland
of stone temple pilots. not that i'm a big fan of these bands, but that
song just sounds so interesting. (i've read about it before - jay said
that no one wanted to sign the wondergirls $ because of the fear of the
clashes of their major egos.) should be kickass. also coming out soon is
the soundtrack to end of days. i can't wait to hear the everlast/lohner
05. my brilliant classmates are
openly planning a private party after this saturday's dance. featuring
lots of beer. yes, the supra-geniuses of my class revert to beer parties.
pretty lame, don't you think? as if it had to be said, i'm not going. what
gets me is how indiscreet they are about it. vron (p.s. if you're a teacher
at st. anselm's then this is the line where i incriminate someone), a senior,
is asking everyone for "five bucks, or you're not going." shove off, vron.
i've psychoanalyzed the beer party thing, like i psychoanalyze everything.
apparently they think that drinking beer is the only - or, at least, the
best - way to have fun, and also the key to getting girls to like you.
that is so assbackwards it's barely funny. what they don't want to admit
is that they drink out of depression, probably from stress over school
work and the eventual college acceptance. that is really sad, that they're
so concerned about their future at such a young age. hence they drink.
i don't. i'm not social anyway. i'm not going to the dance cos, (a) i don't
know any girls (b) i don't dance (c) i don't like horrible music (d) the
atmosphere is totally hostile (guys trying to show up one another - picture
class but worse). it's not a culture i want any part of.
06. "the fragile" drops down to
25, from 16 last week (and #1 in the first week). no one likes good music
anymore. on a related note, i just found out that trent actually used to
admit he purposely made "down in it" sound like skinny puppy's "dig it".
07. if you are female and you find
goth boys attractive, i'm sorry, but you are a lesbian. i considered writing
a very technical explanation for this, but i think i'll let you figure
out what i mean. if you want to see something that should shock and repulse
you (or at least make you think less of goth chicks), check out this page:
babe of the week.
08. tous que j'ai subis, je conserveront
when describing how you feel or
where you are, always use estar.
10. kelly kicks ass.
not fully sure why i decided to
say so much, but i did. periodically i will add this much "news". well,
seeing as how i've spent nearly an hour typing this (and researching what
i wrote), i'm going to end now. bye bye.
03. "To know oneself, one should
assert oneself. Psychology is action, not thinking about oneself. We continue
to shape our personality all our life. If we knew ourselves perfectly,
we should die." -Albert
Camus (thanks Nick)
i think the scariest and strangest
thing i ever saw on tv was one of those religious shows that are on in
the early hours of the morning. this was on at about 5 am, and i was about
8 at the time. the idea of the program was to present dramatic situations
that end in a religious way, in a way that promotes christianity. the episode
that sticks out in my mind was incredibly creepy, not the plot per se,
but how it was filmed. it involved a man dressed up in a clown suit with
a big gun taking hostage a whole room full of adults at a formal party.
it was really strange. the clown was very suicidal. seeing this half-asleep
left a strange and eerie impression on my young mind. the first half which
i barely remember had something to do with old people and their alstheimers
disease. but the scary part was definitely the clown. i think it was filmed
in that poor quality 70s film. lots of shadows too. bizarre.
one link.. i discovered this song
mostly by accident. it's called "downstairs inside" and it's by larissa
dalle. song kind of reminds me of beth orton meets the french band air.
like the clown show, it's really creepy. the song can be download on the
mp3.com link right here: http://www.mp3.com/larissadalle/.
i really have a lot on my mind
right now... like the new nine inch nails album. well ok i don't have that
much on my mind right now. maybe a couple other things. but anyway here
is a letter from maryland senator paul pinsky:
to let you know that I was meeting with the Governor recently and was pleased
to discover the "A Day in Hyattsville" photography contest exhibit currently
on display in the State House. Your 3rd prize winning photo entitled "Water
Work on Oglethorpe Street" caught my eye and I wanted you to know how much
I enjoyed seeing your view of the water spray in the street.
Keep up the
good work and please don't hesitate to call me if I can ever assist you
in any way.
Paul G. Pinsky
|pretty cool. if you want to see
the photo, click on the small-sized picture on the right to reveal the
full-sized scan. it's a good photo considering i'm not only not
an amature photographer but i also don't even take photographs that often.
however, i think i had better photographs in that roll of film.
click to enlarge
i'm ok, how are you?
thanks for asking, thanks for asking...
do you like backstreet boys, nsync, britney spears, spice
girls, 98 degrees, five, boyzone, etc.?
me neither. i just figured out who is to blame for the
whole pop/dance group invasion. are you ready for this?
THE DUST BROTHERS.
what is this i say? yes, the dust brothers, the innovative
and highly respected hip-hop/house dj duo. the same people who have been
bringing into the world brilliant and influential techno music for the
last 15 years.
but how are they to blame? easy: hanson. the dust brothers
like to produce musicians. they produced beck's odelay, which is
on most every critic's top 10 of the '90s list. the brothers produced middle
of nowhere, the seminal album by the hanson brothers. by adding their
special refined, sophisticated touch, the album was an instant success.
it sold millions of albums and was a big hit with the teenyboppers. i was
never pleased with hanson, but in hindsight i can say "at least they played
their own instruments." at the same time as hanson the well-marked british
group the spice girls also hit big, partly due to the attention grabbed
by hanson, also partly due to their "hotness" factor.
next came backstreet boys, then their well-liked rip-off
group nsync, then the not-as-well-liked rip-off groups five, 98 degrees,
as i said... blame the dust brothers.
return trip (for whoever doesn't know how to use their back button)